Tis the season to say merry/happy whatever - but there's something on my mind that is making me feel less than festive: The whole Santa hat thing... Santa hats on everything! Now I get into the holiday spirit too, but enough is enough - it's driving me nuts nuts nuts. So what's a deranged and mentally unstable young girl with gender confusion to do? Retaliate by having Chanuka hats. Chanuka is always overlooked and never given much thought, but it's about time it deserved some credit. Some of your favourite actors and characters on TV are Jewish believe it or not, so I now I take the time to honour them:
Lost's Josh Holloway and Matthew Fox both smoke weed and go to the beach content in knowing they are the Children of G-d.
Battlestar's Apollo likes to recite the Torah in the shower, and evil super-genius Gaius Baltar canoodles with his very own robotic/imaginary shiksa.
Veronica Mars' Logan Echolls dons his kippah and acts innocent when the cops show up. Piz proves that not all Jews are smart, handsome, funny, useful, or worthy of life/space.
Hero's Hiro Nakamura is much too cheerful to be Jewish and yet he is. That little kid - whatshisface is too.
On the next episode of The Office, Dwight and Michael attend a J-Date mixer.
Dexter's title character honed his skills performing Briss' before graduating to serial killing. His buddy Matsuka, gets his thriftiness from his Jewish step-mother and his pervertness from his Japanese father, and yet with his kippah on he looks Chinese... which somehow still makes sense.
Now that I've offended everyone, Merry/happy whatever.